Umang & Varidhi Yadav
Indians are like a completely different species and I’m weirdly proud of it. We have a different culture in different parts of the country, different food, different tourist attractions, different people, different men (haha kidding, men are all the same!).
But there are three Indian habits that every goddamn Indian has, no matter which part!
1. Bhaiya, aapka side stand laga hua hai
It’s a very serious problem in India, because each year out of 1000 people in India zero people die due to side stand accidents!
Wear a seatbelt? Nope! Jump a red light? Sure! Wear a helmet? Dude, I don’t want to destroy my hairstyle!
But your side stand is on? OMG! Now you crossed the line why can’t you be more careful? Do you want to kill yourself? Okay! No problem, I will pin point it every time your side stand is on.
You will be lying to yourself if you said that your eyes don’t automatically look at the cycle stand every time a cycle pass beside you. It’s like our responsibility by birth to tell someone if their cycle’s stand is still down, no matter what you are doing this wakes up our real Indian and you just can’t help it.
2. Madam, aapka pallu car door me fas gaya!
Oh my god, I have to generalize this with men. No woman in the history has ever cared about other woman’s saree or dupatta getting stuck or getting dirty.
But when it comes to men, they are super concerned about a piece of cloth stuck in a car door, it’s hilarious because they’d go to various lengths to make you aware of the situation.
They’d run after the car or they would tell you during a traffic signal but my favorite are the Khatron ke khiladi types, who will tap on your window while riding the bike like GTA to make you aware.
We should appreciate these men who are putting their lives at stake just to save your saree, how will you ever thank them?
3. Aapke bike ki headlight jal rahi hai!
Do you know how much energy a bike’s light bulb consumes? Okay I’ll tell you.
One watt per second, so if you leave a 100 watt light bulb on for 10 hours it would consume 100w x 10 hours that is equal to 1000 watt per hour.
But you don’t care about that! You are just concerned about the rider’s safety. What if he couldn’t see a car in front of him at the daytime and gets into an accident? You just have to be extra cautious.
So stand in front of him, wave your arms like a madman at the daytime and save the person for God’s sake. Tell him to switch the damn lights off! He will be forever grateful that you saved his life, and remember this good deed for forever.
We do a lot of stupid things but these three are the most hilarious ones. So if you are an Indian and are not following the above precautionary measures. Then are you even a real Indian?